Disappointingly we were not allowed to take any photos because we were right under a government building and they didn't want people mapping out the tunnels under them.
Our tour guide enthusiastically introduced himself as a lawyer from the Victorian Era who seconded as a civilian crime police at night. He led us to the first room where we encountered two women standing over the body of a dead man with a gaping wound in the back of his head. The story goes that a wealthy woman, Alison Roche, offered a generous dowry to ensure her daughter Katherine found a suitable husband. An older and prosperous merchant, Alexander was the lucky man. Four years later Alison still had not paid him the dowry. He took her to court and sued her for the money she owed him. During a heated argument at home she hit him in the back of the head with a candle stick. At the time police were paid on commission for the number of arrests; so when an officer showed up he arrested both women. They were found guilty of murder and sentenced to death. Katherine was pregnant, so by law they were required to wait until she gave birth to execute her. However, after giving birth to a daughter, who she then deserted, Katherine managed to escape to Germany to live out her days. Alison was not so lucky and she was executed in the worst of ways. Back then men were executed by hanging. However if a woman was hanged you would be able to see up her skirt, and that was rude. Instead they drowned her in the loch. Which was more of a sewage plant than a lake at that point in time. Personally I'd rather have my skirt looked up than be drowned in a lake of sewage.
Going farther down to street level we entered a room about 20' x 10'. The doorway and a 2' x 3' window were the only opening to the outside. There was a bucket in the far back corner and an oil lamp on a small table. This would have been home to around 12 people of the very lowest caste. That bucket was their toilet, and the youngest of the household emptied it at 7am and 10pm, right alongside all the other waste being thrown down from upper dwellings. Even with the window and door virtually no natural light would have reached the home due to the high buildings above it. The main light would come from the lamp that burned the only oil the poor could afford, fish oil. I can't even imagine how smelly it must have been with fish oil burning, on top of the 12 unwashed bodies and bathroom bucket, with little to no ventilation to clear it out. Yuk.
As we walked out out of the "house" we crossed a close. I would have missed it if he hadn't told us it was there. It was only about 3' wide, making it more of a hallway than a street in my eyes. Even though we were on street level for this building, I could look down through a window on my right and see that the building next door was down even father.
From there we walked into a room with six large painting, three on each side. Our tour guide began telling up about Mary Queen of Scots and her night in Edinburgh when one of the paintings interrupted him. The woman complained that he was going on and on about that Mary who only was there for a day when she herself had an entire street named after her. It was Mary King herself. Our guide and Mary King spoke back and forth for a bit before Mary began telling us a story of her own. Not long into her story the next painting interjected to brag about how he had cured the city of plague; Dr. Jon Paulitius was quite full of himself. Although I suppose when you think you are smart enough to have cured plague you have some justification. Truth be told, he only managed to do so by sheer luck. His theory about plague was wrong and his methods didn't help directly, but in the end he did rid the city of the problem. Granted he also died in the end and never got paid, so sucks for him. I never quite understood who the man in the third painting was, but he got taken away at the end for committing a political crime.
There was a very grim scene in the next room. We learned that this was the home of grave-digger John Craig. The first thing that caught my eye when I walked in the room was a grim reaper like figure with what appeared to be a bird beak sticking out. He was standing over a sick boy in a bed, John's eldest son John. The grim reaper was none other than our doctor friend from the other room, Jon Paulitius He believed that the plague was transmitted in the air; the long cloak was to protect his skin from the disease and the beak was stuffed with fiber and herbs to filter the air. As I mentioned previously, his theories about the plague where completely wrong, but his attire still helped him live much longer than others. Bubonic Plague was actually spread via rat fleas, so his coat protected him from the fleas jumping off his patient and the rats around him. Across the room was another bed was John's wife, Janet and their two youngest boys, Robert and Thomas, who were dying of pneumonic plague. Our guide explained that pneumonic plague was completely incurable at the time, however bubonic plague was not. To cure it the doctor would lance the boils that formed at the lymph nodes in the armpits and then cauterize it with flaming hot metal. Some people did not survive the procedure because of the pain, yet if they did their chances of survival were 50:50 rather than 1:10. Whether that made them the lucky ones is definitely up to interpretation. John Craig, was in the corner, on the floor, under a sheet. He had already died of plague. I would have missed it entirely if our guide hadn't pointed the body out. He also told us that the story of blocking in the people of Mary King's Close and leaving them to their fate was actually a myth. The truth is the close was simply an area allocated for quarantine. Definitely not quite as exciting.
The least exciting stop was a room of benches where we were told to take a seat. Our guide turned off the lights and we listened to an excerpt of a "scary" story written about the boarding up of Mary King's Close. Our guide dropped his stick partway through making us all jump.
Next came a dwelling that would have belonged to a wealthier family. It was definitely much more preferable to the ground floor housing of the poor. It had multiple rooms of semi decent size. To be honest, I probably wouldn't be able to afford an apartment that size in San Francisco even if I wanted to. In the back room there was a pile of toys and books, and random stuff like police patches. The story behind the offerings is that a Japanese psychic came to the close to search for super natural activity, only she didn't find any. That is until she walked into that room and an apparition of a little girl told the psychic that her name was Annie. Long ago her parents told her she was sick and left her there in the house. Over the years she had lost her one comfort, a toy rabbit. Feeling bad the psychic brought Annie a toy and left it in her room. Since that time people have left other stuff for Annie to play with.
Our final stop was the actual Mary King's Close. It was the widest in the city, about 6ft wide, although back then there would have been stalls on one side which would have made the walkway still only about 3ft wide. He took a photo of each group, or individual in my case, that could be purchased later.
Overall it was an interesting tour. I would recommend it if you have the time and funds. Although there's no reason to beat yourself up if you don't make it while you are in Edinburgh.
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